Thursday, July 30, 2009

Playing Doctor

Today's morning activity: playing doctor.
I've been a tad bit cranky the past few days and the guilt always overwhelms me. No one deserves the wrath of my crankiness, most certainly not my children. So, what can you do but make up for it? The dress ups were down, and usually the fact that my living room gets cluttered beyond recognition gets on my nerves. Today however I decided to go with my inner actress and "play doctor". I donned the glasses and stethoscope and with my best nerdy voice proceeded to examine and diagnose each of the kids with horrible illnesses that could be cured with hugs, kisses and a few yogo treats!
Ah, I feel better!

Sunday, July 12, 2009

What is a Family?

I'm reading a book right now that a good friend recommended to me. It's called What is a Family, by Edith Schaeffer. After I got past the first chapter, (which I need to read again now that I understand more of what she's saying and her writing style) I have been challenged to the very core of my homemaking. I never realized what "power" I have as a stay-at-home mom. I never fully comprehended the joy or pain I can bring into my child's life. I never understood that these little beings that surround me day in and day out, mirror so much of my own life.
Have you heard the saying "If Momma ain't happy, no body's happy"?
Today, when we got home from Church I caught myself reflecting yet again. When I put lunch on the table, my little Grace asked me. "Is there cheese on my burrito?". When I confirmed that there was, she proceeded to pout. What makes her do this? And it's not just cheese on a burrito, but rather the fact that this morning during worship, she wanted an animal cracker from her sister's baggie of snacks, not from her own. She was fussy then as well. In the past month it's been a constant battle with myself and with the kids to find an "attitude of gratitude". Where do they get this? Is it from me? Do I throw a fit when things don't go my way? Am I picky when someone prepares something for me? I really have to wonder if they see past the front that I put up and are seeing and hearing the frustration in my voice when things don't go the way I want.
According to Shaeffer, a family is a Changing life Mobile, and Ecologically Balanced Environment, The Birthplace of Creativity, A Formation Center for Human Relationships, Shelter in the Time of Storm, Perpetual Relay of Truth, Economic Unit, Educational Control, Museum of Memories, A Door that has Hinges and a Lock, and Blended Balances.
This is an incredibly high set of standards, and an almost impossible task. I wasn't trained to be and environmentalist, a human relations director, economist, teacher, museum curator, artist or even a theologan. And yet, my children are depending on me to teach them so much. There are many other titles that go along with raising your children. What other job has chef, chaufer, housekeeper, nanny, nurse, personal shopper, money manager and full time assistant written into the job discription!?! Not only must I teach them these things, but I must do it with a heart for God, and a love for others that shines through. Sometimes the task seems monumental. Sometimes I don't think I can do it. Sometimes, I don't think I am doing it. So, what do I do? Right now the only solution I know if is prayer. I figure, with knowledge, comes responsibility... know better, do better.
So what is a family? For me, it's a chance for growth. A chance to learn and grow and become closer to the One who created it all!

Monday, July 6, 2009

Sick & Tired

Whew, who knew sickness could last so long in such a small house? Thankfully I have yet to get it, (and miracle of all miracles, so does Grey) that being said, I'm sick and tired of everyone else being sick and me being tired. Noraa's tradition of crawling into our bed at 5 am to cough for an hour is not one that I'd like to hang on to. Even the little girl I watch when she's out of school is sick today. Tana called into work and I have yet to see the whites of her eyes and it's almost 10am. We just need to be done with this. I've missed Church three weeks now due to illness and as the nursery coordinator, that's not such a good idea! I'd like to sit and worship with my sweeties instead of remembering which kid had what dose at what time!
All that being said, I'm grateful that I am a mommy. Grateful my job is to comfort, to love, to provide and protect these sweet little angels. That when they get up in the night, they come to my side of the bed, wake an ever so tired momma and know they will be cared for. Steam from the shower, honey for a cough, or just a comforting rock in the chair and pray uttered for heath: I'm glad they come to me.
So if you see me this week and notice the dark circles under my eyes, I won't be offended when you say "you look tired". Because I am tired. But I'm so much more than that. I'm a Momma, and I'm proud of it. The bags and sags that I wear upon my face today will fade as the fevers do, and I will have made precious memories with my babies. So yes, I'm tired of the sick, but grateful. Tomorrow is a new day: His mercies are new every morning and I will delight myself in this fact knowing that this season will pass just as it does for mommas everywhere. That next week when we are at the spray ground having a grand old time I can utter a prayer for someone somewhere feeling weary as I do now!